Actress Hayden Panettiere is offering readers an unprecedented look into her personal life with the release of her new memoir, sharing candid revelations about past relationships and her journey toward self-acceptance.
In an exclusive interview with Us Weekly, the 36-year-old actress reflected on her relationship with Heroes costar Milo Ventimiglia, a romance that garnered significant public attention due to their 12-year age difference. Panettiere was 18 years old when the relationship began in 2007, while Ventimiglia was 30.
"Every relationship I've ever been in, I invested my whole self in," Panettiere told the publication while discussing her memoir, This Is Me: A Reckoning. "I saw him as my partner and that it was going to hopefully keep going and evolving and lead to marriage."
The actress revealed a telling detail about the relationship's emotional dynamics, acknowledging a communication barrier that proved significant. "It was a point of contention that I was unable to put the 'I' in front of 'love you' and at the time, I didn't realize or understand why it made me feel so uncomfortable," she explained. "I could only say 'love you' in a casual way. Being older, he was much more aware of what that meant. And that said a lot."
The two-year relationship ended in February 2009, with sources at the time citing a "lifestyle conflict" and noting the costars were in "very different places." Panettiere now describes the breakup as particularly tumultuous, recalling that Ventimiglia initially ended the relationship, then immediately reversed course when she began crying hysterically.
"One hundred percent it was only because I was over the toilet, hysterically crying. It was like my world had crumbled," she admitted. "It was so out of left field, nothing that big or explosive had happened. Nothing had really gone wrong. Nobody cheated. I remember the look on his face being pure shock at how visceral and massive my negative reaction was, and he immediately took it back."
The relationship ended permanently shortly thereafter. Panettiere subsequently began a relationship with boxer Wladimir Klitschko, which lasted on and off from 2009 to 2018. The couple welcomed a daughter, Kaya Evdokia Klitschko, in December 2014.
Perhaps the most significant revelation in the memoir is Panettiere's decision to publicly come out as bisexual. The Nashville alum explained that she had long felt uncomfortable discussing her attraction to women, citing concerns about public perception and professional ramifications.
"It was always the fear of not being perfect, and what my team was going to think about it, what the public's opinion was going to be about it," she told Us Weekly. "It was just never the right time, and it was a very difficult topic to articulate properly. I wanted to make sure that I really sat down and chose my words carefully and was able to tell my story in an honest way, that people understood."
The actress acknowledged the bittersweet nature of waiting until age 36 to share this aspect of her identity publicly. "On one hand, it's sad that I had to wait till I was 36 years old to share that part of me, but better late than never, right?" she said.
With the memoir's impending release, Panettiere expressed newfound confidence in her identity. "Now that I know that this book is coming out, and that I've chosen to share it with the world, I'm comfortable saying I'm bisexual. I'm comfortable to confidently say that, yes, I am bisexual. I said it!"
This Is Me: A Reckoning will be available on Tuesday, May 19. The memoir represents a significant moment of transparency for the actress, who has navigated the complexities of fame, relationships, and personal identity throughout her career in the public eye.